Shame in organisations
We recently held a session with our New Ways Collective on Shame. It followed some training we did about Working with Shame in Organisations with the Gestalt Centre, which we’ve been applying to our work on EDI and anti-racism. It’s something that sits with us always - people feeling shame for their privilege, for their lack of visible action and the generational shame that can exist in those with marginalised identities. And beyond this, it shows up in so many ways in leadership styles, cultural dynamics and workplace practices. We only have to look at the silencing and censoring of speaking up about Palestine to find a very current example of how shame and shaming are at work.
Here’s some of the take-aways from our conversation:
Shame is an everyday thing - it doesn’t always result from big, traumatic moments, but it can show up in small and subtle moments in daily life. It feels like something we need to be much more aware of in conversation about workplace dynamics
Shame prevents belonging - it’s the act of saying you’re not one of us, and that’s its value as a control mechanism to let people know that they’re outside of the norms or codes of this group. We explored how some of our cultures use shame as a way to protect the perception of the family or community from outsider behaviours and ways, and as a result, already have internalised shame to work with and through
Shame can live at an organisational level - those organisational wounds that we don’t want to talk about, issues or moments that we stay silent about, usually indicate collective shame that can stop an organisation from growing and recovering
Shame as part of marginalised experience - we considered how micro-aggressions are way more macro when what they actually do is spiral someone into shame for who they are because of how they other people, or make fun of their difference
De-shaming is essential in our work - we explored ways in which we can invite shame in, how we can depersonalise it and talk about it. But we also acknowledge that this is not something to take lightly, requiring lots of trust and skilful support and facilitation
